How much of a sense of humor do US Customs Agents have?
After a recent trip that included some places where "sewer" means "street", insect bites can be nearly fatal and "hospital" is an empty building that might have had electricity at one point but now has nothing, I returned home and the Customs Agent asked me "if I had anything to declare"
I was tired and dirty and and said "I declare I'm extremely happy to be back home where the water won't kill me, the toilets flush and the hospitals have actual doctors."
He waved me on, but I couldn't tell if he was amused or annoyed or neither and I'm not sure if it was a really bad idea to make a joke to the agent.
Could I end up having problems if I make jokes to US Customs agents?
Does it matter if the joke is pro-US or something different?
Best Answer
In my experience, any given agent, like any given person, may react with amusement, annoyance, or indifference, but as long as you retreat quickly and meekly if an agent is annoyed, you'll probably be fine.
Even the same agent might react differently on different days, or at different times on the same day.
Part of the problem is that the agent might think that you are being evasive, or that you are challenging the agent's authority. If your joke included an explicit statement that actually responded meaningfully to the question, it would probably go over a bit better. I'm thinking of something like "[insert joke here], but I have no goods to declare."
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Answer 2
Most officers will have the usual sense of humor, the normal amount.
But yes, you can get in deep trouble when you make the wrong joke to a customs agent.
As you were home bound and entering your own country, the most trouble you could expect was a very thorough search, down to the body cavities and a lengthened stay in a lock-up till your system has circled so they are sure you did not congest something illegal.
When you make a joke in a foreign country you can add to that, like being blocked from entering the country and getting a ban.
Most of the time they will not go to the excesses, but the officers can initiate things like that, even when they do not have the power to take all actions themselves. And the officers that work in customs do have more powers than many of the others that work in the police force and security.
The actual text of your joke, as you wrote it here, should not be a reason to take very much action, but the wrong officer or an officer in the wrong mood could have started the process and something suspicious, like an insect that left eggs in your belongings or some such, could have made the situation much worse.
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